Tuesday, October 29, 2013

No Agreement and a Possible Visitation

Well.. mediation is a bunch of crap.  I feel like we have wasted so much time with our "court mandated" mediation just to be able to get to court.  I guess I can understand that in most situations it is a good thing, but most people are dealing with people who are human and have a soul.  I have my doubts about Lovely Ex.

Cory received an email the day after mediation last time from Lovely Ex, and she said that they would not be moving here until the week after they were supposed to be here, because she had a "very important work meeting" on Saturday night that she could not miss..  She is moving!  Why is it so important that she go to a work meeting for a job that she was scheduled to leave the week before the meeting?  I give up trying to make sense of anything she says or does.  So, Cory didn't get his visitation that he was supposed to have.  There were four agreements that were made in the last mediation.. One, that Cory would get his kids for visitation that weekend.  Two, that Lovely Ex would provide the school information for the kids and we would be able to call and verify that the kids were enrolled.  Three, that she would provide her address.  Four, that her lawyer would copy and send us the medical records and school records that Lovely Ex had brought with her.  She accomplished three while we were in mediation the last time.  None of the others were done.  Our lawyer decided we were done playing her game.

We showed up for mediation and our lawyer wasn't there yet.  Our mediator took us in to a room, and proceeded to tell Cory that she felt it was in our best interest to proceed without our lawyer as he was only interfering, and that maybe it would be a good idea for Cory to get some counseling to help him deal with his issues..  what?!  Shortly after that, Lovely Ex arrived and the mediator went to talk to her, and our lawyer arrived while she was gone.  We told him what she had said, and I don't think I've ever seen anyone turn that shade of purple before.  He was LIVID.

The mediator came back in the room and began telling us what Lovely Ex was proposing as our agreement for this mediation, and our lawyer cut her off and said "No, we are done.  We would like our certificate of non-agreement so we can go to court."  She began rambling about how it was in the best interest of the parties for them to attempt to come to an agreement and that there was still something that could be done.  Our lawyer told her again that no.. we were done.  Then she got pissy.  She told us that Lovely Ex was here in an attempt to make an agreement, and that yes, things had not worked up to this point, but now she was really going to try.  Couldn't we understand that sometimes these situations just happen?  No.

So then we got to fight with the mediator, fight with Lovely Ex's lawyer, and fight with Lovely Ex.  In a last ditch effort, her lawyer produced the medical records and school records from the last mediation that he was going to "copy and get right over to us", and he told us we could have the kids tonight.  We told them we will still take the kids, but there is no agreement.  We are done, and we are going to court.  So, we'll see if we actually get the kids, but at least now we are moving forward.

Wednesday, October 16, 2013

Too Good to be True

Well, we thought it seemed too good to be true after the last mediation, and it would appear that we were right.  We knew heading in to mediation that nothing she said would be done had been done.  The money was not deposited in to her lawyer's trust account, we had no medical records or school records, there had been no effort on Lovely Ex's side to comply with anything that had been agreed to.  Once again, we figured it would be a quick mediation.  Once again, we were wrong.

We showed up to the mediation about five minutes early, and our lawyer met us in the hall with a "guess who is in there..."  Apparently, she decided to show up.  And, she had the medical records and school records in hand, and was prepared to pay the money.  Our lawyer said no go, she was supposed to have it done before today. The mediator split us up in to two different rooms and spent the next two hours running back and forth.  Lovely Ex's story changed about four different times before her lawyer showed up, and then once he finally showed up he began attempting to piece together the fragments of stories we had been given in a way that wouldn't get his client in trouble.

Mediation was a joke, to put it lightly.  The highlights are as follows:

  • Apparently, she wasn't lying when she told our paralegal that she would be moving.  They will be moving here in approximately a week and a half, and the kids will be going to school here.  She has given us her temporary address where she will be living - with her sister in the house her daddy bought for her when she and Cory divorced, which she left about six months later.  
  • She gave the medical records and school records to her attorney, who said he will need about a week to make copies of them, and then he will give them to us.  We'll see if we ever see them.  Our lawyer said that we needed to at least have a release of information now on the schools the kids are enrolled in so that we could see how they were doing.  Lovely Ex gave us phone numbers of the schools and told us she had called the principal and she would be able to talk to us.  Our lawyer wasn't buying it.  He called the school right then and there with the lawyer in the room, and put it on speaker phone.  He identified himself, and asked about both children.  The principal of Michael's school said that there was no one in the school registered under that name.  Lovely Ex then said she was going to have to call the district and get it straightened out.  Right.  
  • She didn't pay any money, because if she is living here then there should be no need for her to have to pay in advance for the visitations since he will get to see them "all the time."
  • Cory is supposed to get to see his kids the night of the 25th and have them all weekend.  It will be the first time in almost a year that he has seen them.  
I'm really hoping that she lives up to it this time.. I really hate that every time she says something is going to change Cory gets his hopes up that maybe it might be different this time.  We know well enough that we can't trust anything that she says, but it's so hard to have that little glimmer of hope and then have it crushed.  We have another mediation scheduled for the Monday after Cory has his kids to see if they've actually complied this time.  We'll have to see how things go, but my hopes aren't way high.